The Morning After (the Golden Globes) with Charlie Price

Highlights from Charlie Price’s Facebook Page live online review of the show.

The following are edited highlights of commentary excerpted from Charlie Price’s official Facebook page, where he posted live throughout the Golden Globes broadcast. *

Charlie's Morning After wrap up: 

I was tickled by Bill Cosby jokes and piqued by raunchy locker room talk from Tina and Amy.  But alas, I was then plunged into a vat of saccharine, marshmallow, saucy speeches, an initially funny Korean bashing shtick that became a tiresome and belabored bore, and the premature lifetime achievement award for George Clooney, that put me to sleep faster than a bottle of Valium, washed down with a box of Chardonnay (yes I said box).  But enough about the show itself, let's talk hair and fashion! 

Notes from the Red Carpet

I don't like Lupita's dress, but I love her hair --- very hot.

Lots of red: Catherine Zeta Jones doing señorita chic in red. Great dress, looking gorgeous. Allison Janney in red, too.  Looking nice. I love her and her voice but she always looks anemic to me. Julianna Margulies also in red. Stunning. My goddess. But not sure about the dress length. I think I love it.

Patricia Arquette is fab in Boyhood. Great movie, bad hair and unflattering dress tonight. Heidi Klum looks stunning - red everywhere (German Barbie).

Alan Cumming is looking extra gay in a horrible shiny suit. Hard to describe color ---- horribleness.

The Show

Tina and Amy look great, smart, funny. Great hair, Tina. Amy, I hate the award show smile.

Jennifer Anniston looks good. Not super in love with her hair. Benjamin Cumberbatch is hot.

Dakota Johnson - fab dress.

Naomi Watts - great hair, pretty in yellow, and nice necklace.

Oh Jennifer Lopez - soooo fine. She is sexy sexy… don't nobody talk about my Jenny guuuurl!

Colin Firth is divine.

Kerry Washington - beautiful but hate the dress, hate the hair.

Bryan Cranston looks sumptuous.

I like Sienna Miller's hair but stupid, stupid dress.

Katie Holmes is so uninteresting to me. She looks good in a bland way.

Amy Adams looks like a true movie star but I am tired of her being so overly earnest --- I want her to get drunk and tear it up like Reese did with her man.

Salma - rich as hell, beautiful as hell, and never disappoints! All the couture in the world at her disposal…and it doesn't go to waste, darling!

Meryl can do no wrong for me but I have to ask - which is worse: when she tries to look glamorous or when she doesn't get ready?  (and WTF is up with Meryl Streep's hair - is it that magnetic shavings toy from our childhood?).

Kristin Wig is underdressed in a bad dress and has the same hair as Sienna Miler. It looked better on Sienna. It's trying too hard to look like it's not trying.

Oh my god, Jane Fonda is glorious. I cannot believe how absolutely amazing she looks still - and such a great star!  Lily Tomlin is a cherished jewel but looks dreadful, sorry.

Go Jeffrey Tambor!  He is a great actor and so quirky and witty; the perfect person to tell an important story…. Seriously, I hope transgender just becomes no big deal. People should identify however they see fit ---there is room for every flavor!

Kate Beckinsale has bad hair, but a pretty dress. Adrian Brody looks hip but elegant as usual.

Maggie Gyllenhaal was intelligent sexy and stylish in this role and did a decent job with the British accent. I loved the show! The speech is a bit dodgy -rambling and goofy. I like her hair but she looks too much like Annette Bening tonight for such a young lady. The dress was a bland color… I like the idea of a minimalist dress that was kind of what the character would have worn but it didn't quite work (tonight). I'm excited to see what she does next.

I love Ruth Wilson in this role (but she was even better in Luther!)- but she looks just really horrid tonight in an incredibly unflattering dress and bad faux bob; that aside, I am a fan of her in general. Her speech was spot on.

Michael Keaton looks sharp; Christoph Waltz looked pissed -- that was fun. The speeches are predominantly ho hum tonight.  I find myself yearning for an inappropriate Susan Sarandon/ Tim Robbins political tirade.

Oprah needs to give Melissa McCarthy her fashion stylist's number. Now that's how to dress a big, beautiful woman. She looks radiant. Her hair is really good too. But I'm sorry -I do continue to suffer from Oprah fatigue; is she going to be queen of everything forever. I want to put her on an island with Bono so I don't have to hear from either one of them for about ten years or so. Her voice keeps getting more dramatic too.  It's almost as if she's turning into Oprah Earl Jones.

Why is Maconnnahaaay talking like that? The accent is even stronger than ever. His tux is very bomb though. Killer!

Love me some Julianne Moore. She is so genius --- I hope she goes all the way and wins the Oscar. I like her dress. She is absolutely one of the best actresses ever!

Eddie Redmayne is such a pretty ginger ----a great movie star.

Boyhood was one of the best movies I've seen maybe ever – hypnotic.

Post Show Rundown

Lots of red, ravishing dresses from Viola Davis, Julianna Margulies, Catherine Zeta Jones and Alison Janney and crisp, chic, white gowns from Salma Hayek, Emily Blunt and Kate Hudson.

The Best Dressed:  Salma Hayek, Robin Wright, Emily Blunt, Jane Fonda, Jennifer Lopez, Dakota Johnson, Kate Hudson, Salma Hayek, Amy Adams, Julianne Moore, Viola Davis, George Clooney, Ricky Gervais, Matt Bomer, Steve Carrell, Adrian Brody, Matthew Maconahaaaaaayyy - (suit only), Michael Keaton.

Best Hair:  Tina Fey, Amy Adams, Jane Fonda, Robin Wright, Dakota Johnson, Julianna Margulies, Kate Hudson, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Adrian Brody, Ricky Gervais, George Clooney, Matt Bomer, Michael Keaton.

The Bad:  Dowdy vintage ankle revealing hemlines that was fit for a school marm. Kerry Washington Julianna Margulies and Sienna Miller; droopy caught in the rain curls: Sienna Miller, Gwyneth Paltrow and Kristen Wig.

Worst Dressed: Melissa McCarthy, Ruth Wilson, Lily Tomlin, Patricia Arquette, Meryl Streep, Kristen Wig, Gwyneth Paltrow, Sienna Miller, Kerry Washington, Alan Cumming, Billy Bob Thornton, Robert Downey Jr.

Worst Hair: Patricia Arquette, Kristen Wig, Lily Tomlin, and Wes Anderson.

Worst tans: a tie between Channing Tatum and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Worst body shimmer:  Katherine Heigl.

Most boring: Katie Holmes.

About Charlie Price:  Charlie is an internationally recognized, award-winning platform artist who both entertains and educates with his quick but caustic wit and his irreverent take on fashion, beauty, celebrity and pop culture.

*Note: The views and opinions expressed in this blog are solely those of Charlie Price; these views and opinions do not represent those of American Salon, Questex or its parent company or affiliates.